23 Funny Chess Aphorisms

Here is a collection of 23 funny chess aphorisms. It’s a continuation to the chess facts from the previous post, compliment to the chess jokes from the long time ago post and chess humor post. The first aphorism is: A brilliant combination had come to his mind, but didn’t find anyone there and left.

  • He was in time trouble; he had 1/10 of a second left.
  • If we say that we all learn from our own mistakes, that guy has unlimited improvement capabilities.
  • Everybody can look at a chess position, but not many can see.
  • He had a chess mind of a sprinter.
  • One queen is good, but two is better.
  • You don’t look at teeth of a given Knight.
  • He said: When I’m checking my opponent, I’m fearless!
  • Chess Problem: find the worst move (??)
  • He was a famous chess player for a long time, but no one knew about it.
  • He didn’t play chess, he played with chess.
  • In the local chess club there was a portrait of Alekhine, who looked just like Capablanca, and a portrait of Capablancalooked like no one else.
  • He was lefty and played well with white on the Queen’s side and with black on the King’s side.
  • He had a good memory for bad openings and bad memory for good ones.
  • Chess Problem: white takes back 40 moves and mate in 1.
  • He attacks the opponent’s castled King, isolated weak pawns, but most importantly the opponent’s psychological state.
  • Perpetual check feels like nothing else in a dead lost position.
  • Isolated pawns require a very expensive therapy, for keeping them alive.
  • Counter attack is never untimely.
  • Material equal to ¾ of a pawn is also equivalent to about 3 tempis, which at the same time are identical to two weaker moves (by you).
  • Mate is often exists with disagreement of the side to move.
  • Why play 1.e2-e4 right away, when we can later, after long struggle and fighting play e3-e4 after 1.e2-e3?

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Source: https://www.64chess.com/Humor/Cases.html

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Updated 01.06.2024


Thumbs up for that! :lol:
John Herron:
This is not a dream, it's a knightmare!
That's a good one! Thanks for sharing! :lol:
Lynn Green:
She was only a chessmaster's daughter, but she could never find her mate.